Empty Nest Syndrome: Missing Them, Finding You

April 30, 2025

You knew this day would come—but it still hurts. When a child leaves home, it’s common to feel the weight of empty nest syndrome. What you’re feeling is completely natural. You’re not alone—and there’s support to help you through it.

What is empty nest syndrome?

Empty nest syndrome isn’t a formal diagnosis, but it’s a very real and common emotional experience for many parents. It describes the sense of loss, sadness, or disorientation that can come when children grow up and leave home. It’s more than just goodbye—it’s the quiet house, the empty bedrooms, the long stretches between texts. Many parents feel a mix of emotions, from pride and relief to loneliness, grief, or even a loss of identity. For many empty nesters this time also stirs up questions about purpose, aging, and “what’s next.”

Becoming an empty nester can be especially difficult for parents who:

• Are navigating other big life changes
• Have experienced difficult losses in the past
• Have few social connections outside of parenting
• Are facing relationship challenges with a partner
• Don’t have a strong support system to lean on

What empty nest syndrome can feel like

When a child moves out, it’s not just a change in routine—it can feel like the ground beneath you has shifted. One day, your home is full of noise, schedules, and little moments of connection. The next day, there’s quiet—and a whole lot of space to figure out what’s next.

Empty nest syndrome can show up in many ways as you adjust to a life that feels suddenly and profoundly different. Common symptoms of empty nest syndrome include:

• Sadness – You might feel down or teary more often than usual. 
• Worry – Concern about your child’s safety, choices, or future can take up a lot of mental space. 
• Grief – Major changes—even joyful ones—can bring up a deep sense of loss. 
• Loneliness – The house might feel eerily quiet. The absence of those daily interactions can be jarring. 
• Stress – Adjusting routines and redefining relationships can be emotionally taxing. 
• Changes in relationships – An empty nest can impact connections with your partner, family, or friends. You might find a need to relate differently. 
• Loss of purpose – Without the daily rhythm of parenting, questions like, “Now what?” may come up. 
• Identity shift – If parenting has been a key part of your identity, it can be hard to know who you are with an empty nest.

All of that is normal. But if a couple of months pass and you still feel overwhelmed by emotions or stuck—like you’re losing interest in things you usually enjoy, withdrawing from others, or leaning on unhealthy coping strategies—it may be a sign you need more support. 

A mental health professional can help you process these emotions, reconnect with yourself, and feel more grounded in this new phase of life.

How to deal with an empty nest 

One of the hardest parts of an empty nest is figuring out who you are when your daily life no longer revolves around your kids. But alongside the grief, there’s also space to discover yourself and what brings you joy.

Here are some words of advice for empty nesters:

#1  Let yourself feel it

You don’t have to “power through.” Tears, uncomfortable silence, even a little restlessness—it’s all normal and healthy. Be present with what you’re feeling instead of constantly trying to stay busy to avoid it. These transition-related emotions will not last forever. 

#2 Reclaim your identity

You’ve spent years showing up for your child—now it’s time to invest in you. Whether it’s renewed focus on work, discovering hobbies, friendships, volunteering, or exploring something new, your life is still unfolding, your sense of meaning and purpose is shifting.

#3 Give yourself (and your child) some space

It can be tough to let go, especially if you’ve been deeply involved. But loosening the reins helps you adjust to an empty nest and gives you and your child freedom to grow into this next phase.

#4 Focus on the positives 

Empty nest syndrome can be painful—but there can also be joy. Fewer chores. More quiet. Spontaneous nights out or weekend trips. Life might feel unfamiliar at first, but it also holds new freedoms worth embracing.

#5 Reconnect with others

Whether you’re partnered, single, or recently divorced, this chapter can shift how you relate to the people in your life. With parenting no longer at the center, there’s space for empty nesters to reconnect with a partner, deepen friendships, or explore new connections that bring you joy and support.

#6 Get support 

Therapy isn’t just for a crisis—it’s for growth, identity shifts, and finding your footing again. Whether you’re grieving the loss of a role, managing anxiety, or just unsure of how to move forward, talking to someone can help you make sense of it all.

The start of something new

Letting go isn’t easy, but it can lead to new beginnings. With the right support, you can navigate empty nest syndrome and make the next chapter one of growth, meaning, and rediscovery.