Everyday Forgiveness

“Every single person in your life will let you down – some in small ways, some in big ways.” I can’t remember where I first heard that, but it immediately hit me when I did because I knew it was true. And at the same time, I realized I had always acted as though it…

Five critical questions to ask of your mental health solutions

Mental health issues are on the rise and there is no shortage of options for how companies can address the needs of their employees. Considering the landscape of EAPs, health plan networks, and a bevy of tech-only solutions, there are five questions you should be asking all of your mental health vendors. But first, some…

The evolving possibilities of manhood

The new year has been tough for me. I’m experiencing a lot of firsts – I’m going to be a first-time dad, my wife and I just purchased our first home, and we also opened our first private practice. From the outside looking in, it’s all very exciting – and I do feel excited. But…

Who tells your story?

“You have no control/ who lives/ who dies/ who tells your story.” That’s an oft-cited lyric from the hit Broadway musical Hamilton, which chronicles the life of founding father Alexander Hamilton and tells his story – beyond the basic facts that most Americans know. Lin-Manuel Miranda, the show’s creator, stated that prior to reading a…

Alone time vs. couple time – learning to strike a healthy balance

“Let there be spaces in your togetherness… Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.” – Khalil Gibran, The Prophet Anaya and Calvin have been living together for two years. Anaya often…

Real men have feelings

Boys don’t cry. That was the message I received growing up. Like the time I was pushed to the ground during recess at the age of 10. I remember the sharp pain in my knee, and my eyes filling with tears. As I lay there in pain, one of my friends said, “Stop being such…

How do you know when therapy is effective?

We know that talk therapy can be highly effective and life-changing for people grappling with mental health concerns. But for providers and clients alike, there remains a critical question that still sparks much debate: How do you know when therapy is effective? It turns out the answer isn’t always intuitive. We could all use some…

Getting Better Sleep

Your boss gives you a last-minute project, and you have to work into the evening to get it done. You get to bed later than usual but have difficulty falling asleep because your mind won’t let the project go. You toss and turn until you finally fall asleep. Then, because you’re extra tired the next…

Mindfulness: try less, experience more

I first learned about mindfulness in graduate school. One of my professors led a course, and as a stressed-out student it sounded like the perfect escape. I remember feeling excited to finally find a bit of mental bliss and quiet. Instead, I found myself impatiently waiting for everlasting peace, tranquility, and enlightenment. It almost never…

The connection between mental contamination, OCD, and trauma

“It’s as if this horrible dark feeling just comes over me and everything seems extremely gross and dirty. My whole life seems disgusting.” This is how my client Roselle described her internal experience when her OCD symptoms became triggered. To avoid this feeling or to “make it go away”, she would engage in a multitude…